Alternate realities: five bars with lots (and lots) of character
4 August 2016
It’s cold and wet, and everything is just a little grey. You could do with something different… a garden party, the taste of a rare spirit in an opium den-styled lounge, or an evening battling friends on vintage arcade machines.
These five bars let you do just that. Never mind virtual reality, these are alternate realities!
Madame Brussels
Walk off Bourke Street, up three floors and into a scene from Alice in Wonderland at Madame Brussels. With white picket fences, pink walls and vibrant green AstroTurf colouring the whimsical rooftop bar, Tim Burton would feel right at home. Rest on a wicker sun lounge, bite into a cupcake and sip one of the Madame’s delicious winter punches. Or try the famous poached chicken, chive and mayo toastie, served with ‘gay cornichons and Tabasco’!
Kick back as you’re served by staff in Fred Perry tennis whites at the oh-so-kitsch Madame Brussels.
Berlin Bar
First, find the front door. Then, ring the doorbell. Now, suspend disbelief and immerse yourself in post-WWII Germany. The Berlin Bar is divided, just as Berlin was for 45 years. Lounge in the opulent west or huddle on a war-era bunk bed in the east. Thankfully the cocktail list and bar food is available to citizens of both sides. Settle in for a Berlin Negroni, a deep fried schnitzel burger with tasty cheese, sauerkraut and “Maschinengewehr Sauce”, and a slice of history. Ich bin ein Berliner!
Berlin Bar transports you back to the cold war era, when a city was divided by a wall. Source: Facebook
Golden Monkey
A hidden set of stairs on Hardware Lane lead down to the multi-award winning Golden Monkey. Images of Asian pinup girls, Chinese lanterns and moody lighting enhance the Chinese underground boozer vibe. Boasting one of Melbourne’s biggest and best collection of luxury and rare spirits, they also offer a variety of Asian cuisine from Yum Cha to tasty Izakaya dishes. Follow up dinner with the Concubine’s Last Kiss; a blend of Reposado Tequila, Aperol and Vermouth with a blend of tea served in a traditional Chinese steamboat.
Golden Monkey will take you back to Shanghai in the 20s with all the lavish comfort of modern Melbourne.
Bartronica
Forget 2016’s Pokémon infestation and escape to the digital past. Bartonica is the place to head for the perfect mix of gaming nostalgia and good food and drink. Get back to classics like Mortal Kombat and Sonic the Hedgehog or stake your claim to fame in a Nintendo 64 Mario Kart championship and have your top score immortalised in chalk (at least for the rest of the night). Their 80s influenced cocktail menu includes the ‘Kong’ with ice cubes shaped like Tetris and the beer garden has a New York-inspired theme.
Taking you back to an old school arcade, Batronica awakens the nostalgic gamer in everyone, with plenty of food and drink to keep your tummy happy.
Munich Brauhaus
Your smile need not fade to a frown when Oktoberfest is over; the Munich Brauhaus is a year-round Bavarian bash! Their selection of hefeweizens, lagers and pilsners will have you swinging your stein and singing Ein Prosit in your best German accent with 900 others (yes, this bierhaus can actually accommodate that many). Speak to your friendly lederhosen/dirndl dress-clad hosts about the menu – there’s plenty to choose from. There’s nothing quite like a wiener schnitzel, bratwurst or crispy pork knuckle on a cold winter’s day. Wunderbar!
With exclusively imported Bavarian biers and traditional oom pah pah bands it’s the best of Germany without the price of a plane ticket.
***Please drink responsibly***